Friday, November 27, 2009

This is My Life

When I was younger, I always had an idea in my head of what my life would be like when I "grew up."

But, sadly enough, those ideas were derived from television shows, things I saw other people doing, or things my mom did that I vowed never to do (haha...turns out when you become a mom, you kind of start understanding why your mom did certain things!).

Let's focus in on my ideas from television shows. Sure, we all know that those are fake, made up, ideally great looking lives. But I guess somewhere in that understanding, it never really clicked with me that it was also unrealistic and unachievable.

You see, I always wanted to be the mom who did everything (and did everything right). I wanted to be the mom who kept her shape post kids (that kind of went out the window after being pregnant with twins!), the mom who cooked dinner and had it ready when dad got home from work, the mom who always had laundry done and put away, the mom who didn't mind if someone just showed up at our house because it's always clean and presentable, the mom who was involved and made the cutest, most unique desserts for the school party, the mom who's cookies tasted the best, the mom who threw beautiful birthday parties for the kids, the mom who had endless amounts of patients with her children, the mom who did all the work at home and pampered her husband when he got home from work...oh my, I guess I could go on forever, but I think I have gotten my point across.

Anyway, that is the mom I have always wanted to be. The Perfect One.

Is it attainable? Is it even realistic?

Let's see...I have been trying to be that mom for over three years now and still do not feel like I am anywhere close.

What is realistic is that moms do run out of patients when the kids are screaming and whining all day, a mom cannot always keep a house spotless because there are kids (and husbands) going behind her dragging stuff out after she puts it up, who cannot always have dinner ready at 5:30 because she forgot an ingredient and has to come up with a new plan or has babies crying because they are starving, who runs out of energy to fold the laundry at the end of a busy day, and who doesn't have enough give in her to pamper her husband at the end of the way she would like.

But even though I know I can't be the ideal mom, I think I'll still try.

4 comments:

Lori said...

wow - did you write that from my head??? xoxo

Katherine said...

Beautifully written! Although, I am sure you are as close to a perfect mom/wife as there could be...

susan said...

I've been trying for almost 15 years now.... having the babies really knocked my socks off. I'm learning to "go with the flow" far more than I ever have before. I still try to be all those things you listed and more... silly me.
I never feel like I've played with them enough. I think that's what they'd rather, I just can't live in a messy home. *sigh

:):)

Grana said...

Krista, Did we let you watch too much t.v. growing up? Seriously, Don't ever feel like you have to be perfect, yes, strive to achieve what you want for your family and yourself, but it is exhausting trying to be something we can never be, and that's perfect, but the good news is that we can be as perfect as God allows us to be and as long as your husband and children are well cared for who cares about the house if it's a little messy at times or if the clothes aren't folded etc. You are a GREAT wife, mother and daughter. And BEAUTIFUL! inside and out, and I am VERY PROUD of what you have become. I Love You! Krista!